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Dating Tip O' The Month
Much has been written about online dating, but there's one question I get every single day: "What's the big deal about profiles? Nobody actually reads them, do they?"
Surely, you jest.
Go to a dating site and you'll see hundreds of attractive faces.
Finding cute is easy. Finding quality is hard.
And what separates the best from the rest is your profile.
If you don't believe me, keep reading. This article might change your life.
Don't get me wrong – looks matter. No one is even going to read your profile if your photo isn't alluring. But once a basic level of attraction is established... it's ALL about your essays. Here's why:
Why a Profile is Important to Men:
| 1) |
Men have choices. - Yes, we're impossibly shallow. Still, if there are 80 women in my demographic area that are attractive, I'm not going to write to all of them. In fact, any guy with standards (meaning: the guy you want to meet) is going to be pretty choosy. So who do you think he's going to write to? The woman who "likes to laugh", who "wants a man, not a boy", and "hates the liars and the games"? Or the unique woman who has a one-of-a-kind essay? |
| 2) |
Your profile is revealing – Men pay for your dates. And if reading between the lines will save us $75, your profile is the best investment ever. Are your essays three lines long? You don't sound like interesting dinner conversation. Are your essays like a Dickens novel? Perhaps you need a deaf-mute for a boyfriend. Have you gone negative and talked about what you hate about men and online dating? Thank you. You've just saved me a few hours of my life. |
| 3) |
Your profile gives us our opening line. Every man has agonized over this. Some hot woman posts a picture and literally writes NOTHING interesting in her profile. And while we can't resist taking a shot at her, we are paralyzed. Without a personal essay, we have no idea what to say to you. You can't complain that we talk about your looks if you didn't give us anything else to work with. |
| 4) |
Your value goes up – Simply put, the best men – the men who are interesting, successful, quirky, and worldly – CARE about what you have to say. And if your profile is just a list of adjectives and activities, Mr. Right can certainly find a woman who seems to bring more to the table. |
Why a Profile Is Important to Women:
| 1) |
Women have choices – Men often forget that the most attractive woman are written to by EVERY SINGLE GUY on the website. So if she's got every man to choose from, why would he choose you, Mr. "I look good for my age and I really know how to treat a woman"? Unless you're bringing some serious wit and wisdom to your essays, you don't stand a snowball's chance in hell. |
| 2) |
Your profile is revealing –You can be the guy who talks about how he's "looking for a fit woman". You can be the guy "who works hard and plays hard". You can be the guy who states that he's "smart and funny" without ever proving it. But if you sound like everyone else, you're only going to get 1 out of 200 women to write back. Show that you're witty, self-deprecating, interesting and looking for a relationship, and watch your success ratio rise astronomically. |
| 3) |
Your value goes up – A man who takes the time to write something interesting is the kind of man who remembers your birthday, pays his income taxes, and asks about your parents. A man who can't be bothered to explain why he's different and wants to be in love is probably not that different and probably doesn't want to be in love that bad. |
| 4) |
Really. Women have LOTS of choices – Just this week, I spoke with a 20-year-old woman who received 8000 emails since she first signed up. I once dated an attractive 32-year-old woman who informed me that she had received FIVE HUNDRED emails in her first week online. What set me apart? My profile. |
While it might sound like I'm beating my own drum here, I assure you, this is all about you. Your success. Your happiness. Your future. Great profiles attract the right people to write to you, and compel others to respond to your emails. I signed up for JDate eight years because of one woman with one amazing profile. (And yes, she did write back to me). That's how powerful the written word can be.
If you're interested in having more power, control and success in online dating, I would highly encourage you to consider one of these three options.
| 1) |
How to Write A Profile That Attracts People You Want to Meet – A one-hour CD with all of my top profile writing tips. It's the best material I've got. Only $29.99. |
| 2) |
E-Cyrano Profile Writing – My company has been writing profiles that get results since 2003. So if you'd rather trust a professional to capture your personality than to do it yourself, this is the service for you. Prices range between $59 and $199. |
| 3) |
Work with Me – If you want the best service and the most personal attention, you and I should talk. I will make sure that you have an A++ profile that inspires others to do unmentionable things to you within 24 hours. |
If you find that only losers are responding to you, you can do something about it. I literally have HUNDREDS of client testimonials, including at least a dozen weddings from people who had their profiles written by myself and E-Cyrano.
Whatever you do, do something.
And please stay in touch and let me know how it goes.
Your friend,
Evan
To read previous Dating Tips O' the Month, please check out our Archive.
For more advice from Evan, please visit www.evanmarckatz.com.
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